A very wise friend once said of me of having a very strong sense of self. I took it as a compliment, as it was, liked it and have not forgotten about it. I think it’s true too; if nothing else, my self-obsessiveness absolutely requires it. Hence the blog, hence “i am my Muse”, ha ha.
I read somewhere once that the Japanese have a relatively weak sense of self partly because they don’t have an equivalent of the word “I”. Instead, the “I” changes depending on who you’re talking to, who you are (sex, status, class, etc) and where you are. So you’re perpetually considering how your society and peers consider you.
Personally I think that’s bullshit, someone’s just taking linguistics too far. We’ve all been brainwashed by this individualism ism. We throw it around so much that we believe it now. Everyone’s an individual.
Our lives are not that different from each other. Most of us are behaving exactly how the collective expects / shapes us to behave. There are exceptions, but they exist in Japan too.
1. Do you have a job? If not, do you want a job?
2. Are you in love? If not, do you want to be in love? Ever?
3. When was the last time you bought something you didn’t need?
4. Are you saving up for the next thing you don’t need?
5. Do you want to be HAPPY? (unless you’re already HAPPY?)
You get the drift.
Not there’s anything wrong with being a consumer, having a career, chasing your dreams or whatever. But it’s hypocritical to have too much pride in being something one is not.
So whilst I’m formulating all this in my head, my Self tells me that I need to do something different. To give meaning to My Life. To be an Individual. But really I just want a good job, more money and someone to love me.
Can we stop going in circles?
